What to do if you can’t physically be with your special someone? That’s hard but totally manageable. Today you will learn exactly how to survive a long distance relationship successfully.
we simply can’t help how we feel about someone, no matter how far they might be. And guess what? Just because they are going to be far, doesn’t mean all bets are off.
You shouldn’t discredit a long distance relationship if you really think that person is special. Nothing worth having in life is easy to pursue sometimes, even love!
How to survive a long distance relationship
How to survive a long distance relationship comes down to 2 things: 2 people who know what they want and can commit.
I’m living proof. To summarize my story, I had a long distance relationship with a Spaniard for 2 whole years. We were so far, we were literally on different continents.
I was in the US while he was in Spain. Fast forward to now, we live together. So if we can do it, so can you!
Here’s exactly 9 amazing useful tips on how a long distance relationship can stand the test.
When learning how to survive a long distance relationship, one of the most important things IS communication.
If you are just starting a long distance relationship you need to figure out when you will be talking to each other. Is it every day, a few times a day? Once a week? Is there a time difference? Whats their work schedule like?
Talk about it and organize for a communication plan.
Maintaining any kind of relationship means enjoying every day moments together. That’s where technology comes in. Utilizing technology to communicate every day is one of the best long distance relationship tips that exist.
Have your partner feel like they were really there by being incredibly detailed. Keep them up to date with your special moments and activities.
Instead of saying things like “Sarah and I went to the park today” say “I went to Central Park with Sarah, we had such a great work out. We walked for 5 miles at 3 and it was a sunny day, there weren’t that many people around and I even didn’t see that many tourists”
See the difference?
These details make things much more entertaining for your partner to listen to. It also helps them feel like they knew what went on even though they weren’t there.
Basically keep them in the loop.
Majority of people have access to internet so there’s no way you truly can’t communicate even if your miles away. It’s common for long distance relationships to talk alot in this generation because there always connected.
Now a days, you can phone call, facetime, whatsapp, facebook call, the list literally goes on and on.
Have a plan to communicate. Know your preferred method of talking, when you will talk, and how often.
Creating this plan makes both partners stay on track instead of thinking or wondering why the person isn’t calling or when you will talk to them again.
Keep the relationship private and stay confident
Keep your long distance relationship private or between people you can really trust so you can remain confident about it.
You don’t want a lot of outside opinions influencing your thoughts. This will contribute to insecurity in your relationships.
Reason why is because there are tons of naysayers. Many people will have a very strong feeling about you being in a long distance relationship. That’s not your problem to explain yourself to make them understand.
Nor should you have to!
The most common judgements and hesitations of a long distance relationship are:
- Why not find some one closer
- A cheating partner
Reality is though, they don’t know your partner, only you know your partner and your relationship. Trust your gut and your own judgement.
These negative opinions are really hard to digest in the beginning. To prevent people from getting inside your head, don’t even talk about it if you don’t have to. This is a great long distance relationship tip because people can get to you.
People can be negative and if someone doesn’t know the full situation, why overexplain to try to get reassurance? It’s a waste of unneccessary energy.
Save your confidence and your energy and talk about your relationship with your partner who truly is aware of everything.
Have a plan to see each other
This is super important. When trying to figure out how to survive a long distance relationship, you need to know when you’re going to physically be seeing your partner.
Don’t disregard the importance of seeing each other. Sometimes a long distance relationship leads to fixed ideas that perhaps when you meet up in real life, you don’t click the way you thought you would.
Seeing each other as frequent as possible keeps things fresh and lets your love grow.
The last thing you want to do is let things go stale and go really long periods with out seeing each other. See each other often as your schedules allow it.
Per my experience, my partner and I always used 2-3 months as a time stamp.
Make up a time frame that is realistic for both of your schedules and plan dates.
Commit or let your partner know your not commiting
Figure out if you are both committed to the relationship from the very beginning. This is easier said than done but why not try to prevent confusion?
Ask your partner these relationship questions:
- Are you seeing anyone else or do you plan to ?
- Do you believe in monogamy?
- Will you be honest with me?
- Are you going to commit to making plans to see each other?
Even though some responses might suck, atleast you know the truth. This prevents you from getting hurt and not knowing what to expect.
If you don’t talk about it, you won’t know. This gives you clarity so you are both on the same page and avoids either parties having a false conception of what the relationship really is.
Commit to the relationship, commit to each other, and commit to seeing each other. Those are the basic commitments. If you can’t commit to that then it’s time to have another conversation.
Have a solution for when you will merge lives
You MUST have an end game plan in any long distance relationship. If you don’t, you will eventually start to think, where is this actually going?
Reality is, when learning how to survive a long distance relationship, one person in the relationship will have to move.
So ask yourselves, which partner is going to move? If the answer is no one wants to do it, then you really should think about if the relationship is going to work.
Why? Because this means that your long distance relationship will never grow out of the long distance phase.
Having a plan not only gives you answers but keeps both partners on track and lets you know how long the actual long distance commitment will be.
Doing this gives you both something to look forward too and educates you on when your relationship dynamic will change.
Perhaps this isn’t the conversation you’ll have the first date but the sooner you know your solution, the quicker you both will merge lives.
Moving anywhere is a process, let alone moving to another country so prepare! It’s something to organize and discuss with your partner within the first year.
Focus on yourself
Try to focus on yourself and the things you need to do, not only on the relationship. I know it’s hard to not make your significant other your main priority, but we all must love ourselves first before we love someone else.
Make sure you are taking time to grow and be better apart from the relationship. After all, the relationship shouldn’t be your whole life, it should be a part of your life.
To often, long distance relationships lead to too much codependency. Try to keep some things of your life private to keep your independence.
This gives both parties space and the room to feel like they can focus on themselves. As a result, you both have more to learn about each other and the relationship doesnt get boring.
From the beginning, be honest about your emotions and commitment so you can truly get to know your partner.
Don’t bottle up emotions because odds are your partner probably feels the same.
Try to get to really know them, ask them questions when you are together – analyze the time you spend together – Was it fun? Were you happy?
Sometimes we create images of who people are. With so much time apart it could contribute you to having a different interpretation of them. Check in with your reality.
You can also read books to help you keep a good perception. One of the best is 5 love languages.
Regardless, always tell the truth even if it hurts so you can grow a meaningful relationship.
Be realistic with your sacrifices
How to survive a long distance relationship means being honest with your sacrifices. Know and accept the sacrifices you will make for the relationship.
If you make moves, but never really wanted to, you will start to grow animosity towards your partner. Stay true to what you want but also compromise with your partner.
Sacrifice — is the biggest downfall of any long distance relationship. Not everyone wants to do so much.
Know that who ever is taking the leap to move, they are sacrificing ALOT. If you are on the other end, be supportive and empathetic, it is not easy for anyone to move, especially for love.
Once the moving partner arrives, try to get settled together and know the paperwork process. If it’s a different country, it will involve a good amount of paper work.
Long distance relationship actitivities
You need to do long distance relationship activities to keep it fresh and to stay connected. This will make your relationship stronger and exciting since you’ll have something to look forward to.
Here are the best ideas of how you can have a unique date when you are far away:
- Cook together
- Virtually show them around your hometown
- Enjoy facetime dates such as meals, wine nights, movie nights, etc
- Send a care package and make a date out of it
- Write an open when letter and give them an occasion on when to open it
- Organize a dream bucket list together
- Play games
- Collaborate your next visit together
- Plan conversation dates so you can ask each other anything
- Teach each other something
How to survive a long distance relationship for a long period of time
To survive a long distance relationship for a long period of time, you need to know when the long distance will end. Find an end date and commit to it.
If plans change, speak up. The last thing anyone wants is to be waiting for someone to only find out it was a giant waste of time. You owe your partner the truth.
What kills long-distance relationships?
Not communicating about things is essentially the root of what kills any relationship. You have to stay up to date on your desires and goals because guess what, if something changes, all plans can change.
Long distance relationships calls for extra planning so if you guys see you have different goals in the end, it won’t work. Either way its best to talk about these things with your partner so you know their status.
Can long distance relationships work?
Yes, long distance relationships can work if 2 people are open for having this type of relationship, commit, and are honest. It’s not as hard as people make it out to be but it’s definitely not for everyone.
If you follow the advice in this article, you will be in great shape.
When to let go of a long distance relationship?
You should let go of a long distance relationship when it no longer serves you and it becomes too toxic. The reality is, any kind of intimate relationships is a lot to handle.
A long distance relationship might find a dead end road sooner if you don’t have a end goal together. If consistent problems keep coming up, it could be very difficult to solve those problems so far away. In other words, if it becomes too exhausting or doesn’t have a future, let it go.
How to survive a long distance relationship conclusion
These long distance relationship tips will keep you and your partner headed towards a bright positive future together.
All relationships are hard work, no matter the distance. Making an effort, being honest, and commiting will make a world of a difference.
Relationships are meant to work for you not against you, make sure things are meeting your needs. If not, have a conversation on how you can feel pleased. Always communicate so you can stay up to date with each other.
Have you ever been in a long distance relationship or have thought about one? Let me know in the comments below!